Thursday, April 26, 2007

Anti-Telstra Rant 

In parallel with Google taking 3 weeks to approve access to their Adwords API, despite the fact that my business has spent $1 million with them.... I moved house and needed a new phone connection.

Because I knew it can take up to 10 working days to get ADSL happening, I booked the phone connection for 2 weeks before we took possession of the house (which I guess one probably shouldn't do, but I live and breathe online...)

The Telstra guy phoned me from the property and said the builders had used a non-standard pipe, and the driveway would need to be dug up. I asked if there was any other way to proceed and he said no, HAS to be dug up. So I let him book the contractor for me. A few days later I rang the contractor to find out when it would happen, and he said he had the job noted down, but had not given it a date yet.

A few more days passed, and I woke up in the middle of the night with the realisation that the reputable builders were unlikely to use a non-standard pipe (conduit I think it is called) if they knew it would lead to the driveway being dug up - it's a nice driveway.

So I rang the builder, and they said the pipe is standard. So I cancelled the contractor, and re-booked Telstra. A week later a new Telstra guy arrived and (eventually) conceded that the pipe was fine - but there needs to be a trench dug from the footpath to the Telstra connection - so he would book the contractor for me. Same contractor, same necessity for me to contact him and get him to book the job.

Contractor came out and said "sorry, non-standard pipe, can't do it", even though I told him Telstra had given it the all clear. I then had to get contractor, Telstra & builder all talking... and finally we had a landline connection...

...1 Whole Month After I Booked It!

Then 4 days after ordering ADSL through Internode it was rejected because Telstra had failed to update their database to show that our phone line existed.

So now I expect to get ADSL 6 weeks after booking the phone connection, and 1 month after I took possession of the house. I need ADSL to work, to pay of the mortgage.


The moral of the story is that while outsourcing might have its advantages, it is terribly inefficient in this instance. I imagine that 30 years ago the entire job would have been handled by one person, and done quickly. Unfortunately the division of responsibility makes it hard for me to point the finger at who is to blame...

Hopefully I will get some money out of Telstra because they took so long.

Monday, April 16, 2007

Face over naughty bits 

It has been scientifically proven - when observing images of naked women, what men look at the most is the face. Strangely, women using hormonal contraceptives concentrate on the genitalia of naked men.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Forget about dominoes - try eggs! 

Unlike dominos, these are not meant to topple - rather they are a fragile work of art

Friday, April 13, 2007

McAfee Wankers - Password Hint 

I can't recall the situation, but maybe a year or two ago I noted down the ridiculously USA-centric choices they provided as my compulsory password hint question when I registered/joined something:

What was the make of your first car?
Who was your childhood hero?
What was your favorite childhood sports team?
What is your uncle's/aunt's middle name?
What was your high school mascot?
What was the name of your first employer?
Who was your first grade teacher?

1) It's quite possible I have never owned a car
2) I never had a childhood hero
3) Didn't support a team (I'm a nerd remember, that's why I'm using your product!)
4) I have many aunts & uncles and I definitely do not know their middle names!
5) In NZ high schools do not have mascots
6) Was that my paper run or real job? Company name or bosses name?
7) In NZ we didn't have first grade. We had standards and forms

What's wrong with the good old "mother's maiden name"? Or perhaps, let me write my own question and answer!

Sunday, April 08, 2007

I Sleep Naked 

Nothing to do with sex life, or naturist ideals - it's just more comfortable and saves on laundry expenses!

I can't wait for a movie that has the star spy/cop/slueth jump out of bed and deal with some intruders 100% naked. It could be a scene remembered thru the ages if done right.

Meanwhile there is a website devoted to sleeping nakedly -

Friday, April 06, 2007

Lemonheads April 5 2007, Corner Hotel 

I quite liked the support band Skipping Girl Vinegar & will happily watch them again sometime.

Based on two Evan Dando solo gigs a few years ago, my opinion is that he has two types of shows:

1) fun, spontaneous, cute, charismatic - whole crowd has ear to ear grins
2) self-indulgent, unprofessional wank - many leave before the end

After last night I can add

3) workmanlike

He played all the songs you expect him to play, played them properly, zipped through them all in an hour.... and he had an aura of "just another day at work". I think I smiled twice.

Monday, April 02, 2007

Online Elections are starting to become reality 

(I've kinda chuffed, because I predicted this in a high school essay circa 1980).

In Estonia over 30,000 people voted online in their parliamentary election - roughly 3% of the voters. Cleverly, after voting online you can subsequently vote in person - and that will supercede your electronic vote.

If they can do it, can't countries like Australia do it as well?

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